Dick Van Dyke Quotes

1. Today, if you're not an alcoholic, you're nobody.



2. I've retired so many times now it's getting to be a habit.



3. Women will never be as successful as men because they have no wives to advise them.

4. A lot of violence, a lot of gore in it, and I just didn't want to do that kind of thing.

5. No, no, it was the relationships. That was that group. People believed that Rob and Laura were really married in real life. You know, a lot of people believed that.

6. Bob Hope, like Mark Twain, had a sense of humor that was uniquely American, and like Twain, we'll likely not see another like him.

7. But I wish they would make a musical of some kind. I miss musicals so much. You don't see them anymore.

8. I cannot tell you what it means when children recognize. This is about the third generation for me. And when kids that small recognize me, it really pleases me, very gratifying.

9. But once we got on the air, everybody except Morey Amsterdam pretty much stuck to the script.

10. I don't have any children, I have four middle-aged people.

11. I grew up in Danville, Illinois, right in the middle of the state.

12. I have four children and I have seven grandkids.


13. I don't think we've got much of a chance to tell you the truth. But our main problem is our audience skews a little older than most shows, and I don't think our people can stay up that late. I certainly can't.

14. I loved to fall down.

15. I learned everything that I know about comedy and about show business and a lot about life from Carl.

16. I never made a good movie.

17. I think it's being thrown at the wolves, we call it in our business.

18. I think most people will tell you that. They can go along and, while they're denying that they are addicted, say it's stress this, it's this, it's that. But I - it's - I think - I really believe there is a gene. Some people become addicted and others don't.

19. I turned down some movies that were quite good, mainly on the basis of taste.

20. I think the saddest moment in my life just happened two months ago. My old nightclub partner passed away, Phil Erickson down in Atlanta. He - I owe him everything. He put me in the business and taught me about everything I know.

21. I wanted to be a radio announcer.

22. My kids are so much better parent than I was.

23. I was always in show business but in many ways was not really of show business. I didn't move in show business circles, particularly, still don't do it.

24. My son Barry, of course, has been on from the beginning. And his son Shane is playing now a med student regularly on the show. And at one point or another, I've had all four of his kids on the show.

25. No, I did night clubs right here in Los Angeles. My partner, Phil Erickson, put me in the business, a guy from my home town, a dear friend who we just lost a couple of months ago.

26. Oh, I had an idea for a pilot of my own at the time, and then Carl sent me about eight scripts and simply I threw my idea out the window because the writing was just so good.



27. Oh, well, my first love is comedy or singing and dancing.

28. Probably one of the happiest moments, outside the birth of all of my kids, was the first time we won an Emmy, that the show won an Emmy. That was a big night.

29. So as my kids will tell you, they had a pretty normal life.

30. So I think we're kind of an alternate choice for people who have had it with sex and violence.

31. Stan said he used to keep Hardy late, make him miss his golf game, and really get him mad.

32. So at 16 I got a job at the local radio station. And I was working after school and weekends. I did the news; I did everything. I did - played records.




33. We had all week to rehearse. An audience would come in at the end of the week and we'd our little show. Most of the ad- libbing happened during the week on the show.

34. You know, I'm almost out of the habit of watching episodic television now.

35. You can spread jelly on the peanut butter but you can't spread peanut butter on the jelly.






36. "It means you never know what's going to happen," I said. "You do your best, then take your chances. Everything else is beyond our control".

37. I didn't know the answers, but I could feel that the things that gave life meaning came from a place within and from the nurturing of values like tolerance, charity, and community.

38. We should never judge a day by its weather.

39. (My mother) once cooked a ham and later found it in my father's shirt drawer. I am not kidding.

40. Those songs (Mary Poppins score) didn't just get under my skin, they became a part of me then and there, and thinking about it now, they've never left.

41. I have also heard and read various accounts of why they (Sheldon Leonard and Carl Reiner) liked me. My favorites? I wasn't too good-looking, I walked a little funny, and I was basically kind of average and ordinary. I guess my lack of perfection turned out to be a winning hand. Let that be a lesson for future generations.

42. Life is like a box of chocolates, I'm a nerd and I read books.

43. I remember in the book that Caractacus was married. There was no love interest, no love story. So I think bringing Truly Scrumptious in works very well because we had assumed he was a widower. And they couldn't have picked a better Truly Scrumptious than Sally (Sally Ann Howes). They came up with Sally Ann and I heard her voice, and it was the richest contralto. She auditioned with "The Lovely Lonely Man" and I thought: "My God, this girl is great!" and then she was stunningly beautiful. She loved those kids and they loved her, which I think comes across on the screen. They just thought a great deal of her and she spent a lot of time with them, you know, between shots - telling stories and playing games during all those long waiting periods.

44. I was in all the plays and everything. But I don't know, at that time show businesses looked like the moon, you know, it was so far away.


45. I never wanted to be an actor and to this day I don't. I can't get a handle on it. An actor wants to become someone else. I am a song-and-dance man and I enjoy being myself, which is all I can do.

46. I think there has to be some credibility to the humor, especially if situation comedy has to have a situation. And some of them don't.







47. I took a few too many falls in my life.


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